Humor

Gaslighting Alert!

~ ddwsmith7 ~ Leave a comment

I am about to ask you to do something I have never asked before in a post. Please go to the link I have listed below, and read the article printed in the January 22, 2017 Psychology Today post.

This is very well-written and clearly explains what I am talking about when I refer to “gaslighting”. I would only plagiarize them to explain to you.

https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/here-there-and-everywhere/201701/gaslighting-know-it-and-identify-it-protect-yourself

 I believe we are continuing to watch masters of gaslighting perform before our very eyes. I have seen more and more Trump supporters coming out of the haze that he has been spewing since he entered the political world. They were amateurs and he had already mastered “The Art of The Deceit”.

Plus, he brought along his mentor, Steve Bannon. He is the mastermind. I get an image of Sydney Greenstreet in “The Maltese Falcon” trying to run the show. That reminds me, when I watch Sean Spicer I visualize a blend of Peter Lorre and Elmer Fudd.

Back to gaslighting. I am writing this under the assumption you’ve read Psychology Today post. Let’s see if there have been any examples of this psychological tactic in Trump’s technique for his road to the White House.

  1. They tell blatant lies: Where, oh where to start? From, any statistic that he’s cited to how many people love him. According to the Trump Administration, these are blatant “Alternative Facts”. They’re gaslighting the word lies
  2. They deny they ever said something even though you have proof: Again, quite the selection to pick from. The topics that come to mind are tax returns, comments about 95% the population…
  3. They use what is near and dear to you as ammunition: I don’t even want to repeat what I could print for examples. Women’s looks, physical handicaps, Gold Star families, war heroes and so on and so on…
  4. They wear you down over time: What do you think happened to the Republican Party?
  5. Their actions do not match their words: This includes every time he said “I love the ( fill in the space) people, and they love me”. The first part of this statement was the gaslighting, the second part was the result. See how it works?
  6. They throw in positive reinforcements to confuse you.: Who can forget “What do you have to lose??!!” or “It’s freezing and snowing in New York – we need global warming!”
  7. They know confusion weakens people: Come on, he got us ALL on that one. Still does…
  8. They project: Some of the accusations regarding Hillary’s connection with Goldman Sachs are nothing compared to the bedfellows he has there…although that “affair” may be over.
  9. They try to align people against you: If you play back any footage of Trump, you will not hear the words “I read and I deducted that…” no, he always refers to geniuses and other super humans that have told him.
  10. They tell you or others that you are crazy: This includes anyone that disagrees with him.This technique also requires an element of the Pygmalion Theory.
  11. They tell you everyone else is a liar: I am so glad he took on the media as his enemy. Historically this tactic has worked in government takeovers of “banana republic” countries. Don’t think it will work here.

So, these are the 11 techniques regarding the tactic of gaslighting.

Just remember, Trump is just pouring Bannon’s kool-aid.

Two other gaslighting situations occurring now that concern me are:

First, how much of the planet is starting to go to “hell in a handbasket” and we’re being gaslighted into Donny’s issues and meglamaniac reactions to what people are saying about him and how many people REALLY attended his inaguration. Or the most important assignments of his cabinet and the (Yikes) Supreme Court  are being determined and we’re being gaslighted by a travel ban. I have heard the word “impeach” 19 times since inauguration day. Never heard it in Obama’s 8 years.

Which brings me to my biggest concern and largest gaslight illusion occurring now. Let me ask, where has Pence been during Trump’s fiascos? He was pulled off the stage by Republicans and locked in a closet. He is the Rebublicans’ “Great White Hope” and they’ve successfully distanced Pence from the circus.

We’ll see what he does if he’s the deciding vote on the Secretary of Education nominee Betsy Devos.. That will tell us if he’s a just another “Republican first”, regardless of the consequences. In this case, the future of education for our children. My gut also tells me that if appointed, Supreme Court Justice Gorsuch will force the court to lean so far right that many battles will become bitter. We won’t be fighting to obtain civil rights, we’ll be fighting to keep the freedoms we’ve already fought for and won.

What I hope is that they realize the water has been mucked. Even when he is sworn in, the rules of the game have changed while our Legislators were gone. The people are beginning to call the shots, and the media is on our side. Let’s hope the Courts are too.

Now that you are aware of gaslighting, be aware of its power. When you see it, repeat the following statement:

Wrong is still Wrong even if Everyone is doing it. Right is still Right even if no one is doing it.

Trust your gut.

Reality Rears Its Ugly Head

~ ddwsmith7 ~ Leave a comment

First let my say that I have not watched “19 Kids and Counting” about the Duggar family so I don’t know the inside scoop on show content. I am familiar with large families since I did, after all go to a Catholic school.  But 19 kids!!! Yikes!! As Groucho Marx said “I love my cigar, but I take it out of my mouth once in a while!”  I figured that the show was just about keeping up with laundry and meals. Since I have trouble keeping up with 3 people I didn’t want to be humbled so I never tuned in. I imagine Mrs. Duggar is reconsidering her decision to go along with Mr. Duggar trying for a Guinness Record or a Reality show.  The show has been cancelled but there’s still hope.  She only needs 50 more babies to make the record book of 69.  And I’ll bet the word episiotomy hasn’t been uttered in that household for years.

I have also never viewed an episode of “Here Comes Honey Boo Boo”. I guess my life never seemed so bad that I needed Mamma June to show me it could be worse.  The first time I saw the show advertised I thought it was going to be another weight loss show with a mother-daughter theme. I do know that Mamma June has made some questionable parenting decisions so I found it amusing when she publically criticized the Duggars.  She wouldn’t be my first choice for a moral compass!

It would be interesting if someone checked these two households to see if they would even be certified under the Day Care laws in Arkansas and Georgia to raise their families. When people say “Children don’t come with instructions” they should check out their state’s laws telling other people how to treat our children. It’s a pretty good checklist.

Believe it or not I’ve never watched anything Kardashian. They represent to me the epitome of over indulgence and decadence. Famous for beautiful brown eyes, I wonder if any of the “K” women see the anguish in the beautiful brown eyes of the starving mother holding her starving child in the TV ads. With their money they could help so many, but they seem too selfishly materialistic for  that. Quite possibly, Caitlyn may be the only “Real” woman coming from that household.

Speaking of “Real… of anything” shows, I don’t believe they’re real after the first episode. There is no way that I could continue my normal routine after I realized that a cameraman, soundman and millions of viewers would be witnesses to my every move and bodily sound.

The one show that I for sure will never watch is “Why Planes Crash”. I learned my lesson when I let my young son watch “How Hot Dogs Are Made”. He hasn’t had a hot dog since. My daughter is going to Japan  this month. In order to assure that she won’t board the plane with me clinging to her ankles and dragging along, I’d best not watch the crash show.

The above are just a few of the shows I avoid.

What shows do I watch? I’m a “Madam Secretary” fan because I like Téa Leoni and the way she humanizes the position of Secretary of State. I also liked “The Good Wife” until all the sex started seeping into the plots. Personally, the only sex scene I am good with is when two people begin to kiss. The next scene should be one of the parties walking out of the bedroom tucking in a shirt or blouse. I get the idea without watching the entire sexual encounter unfold before my eyes.

I also like challenging game shows. In one week alone I knew two answers that Ken Jennings didn’t know on Jeopardy, and then discovered that I am NOT smarter than a 5th grader.

And when it comes to “Reality TV”, I’ll watch the news.

Silver Alert…They’re Watching out for us

~ ddwsmith7 ~ 1 Comment

The MN Legislature passed a Bill (HF805/SF857 for those of you who follow these things) referred to as the Silver Alert Bill. It will establish a system similar to the Amber Alert only the goal of this bill is to protect our oldest children vs our youngest. It assists lost senior citizens with Alzheimer’s, Dementia or brain damage.

I’m not going to expound about the Bill, but I know it’s about me. Maybe not now, but I’ve entered that stage of life where you get dealt a new hand.  Suddenly Mother Nature starts taking back the gifts she gave you to use (obviously borrowed) such as hearing, vision, knees, memory, bowel control etc. And I am not alone. I move in a very large crowd previously known as Baby Boomers whom I now refer to as the Grey Tsunami. Right now we are a consumer group large enough to cause change in legislation, medicine and advertisements.

When I was growing up in a Worthington we had our own version of the “Silver Alert”. It was everyone keeping an eye on each other. If it was getting dark, when the one street light in town came on and Ol’ Johnny was still walking the streets repeating in a squeaky voice “Nice day for the ducks!” someone would simply walk him home. Now technology, dogs and people with guns will be on the lookout for us.  (Actually most of us mastered the wandering, dazed look at concerts in the ‘60’s & 70’s. They found us then…they can find us now.)

I first started to notice the impact of my generation in ads on TV right after I turned 60 (3 ½ years ago…yes, I’ve started to measure in ½ years). There was a catheter commercial on. I stopped, sat down and watched it…with interest!! It was then I noticed how many ads there were for every joint giving out, every organ beginning to fail and multiple miracle remedies for each. The only problems were the side effects  of the cure.

It reminds me of when my kids were little. My son was probably five and my daughter was three years old. I was cutting vegetables in the kitchen when I heard one of them whimpering. (We had a rule: if there isn’t blood or danger there will be NO screaming). But this was more of an “I want attention so I’ll pretend I’m hurt” sound. In my best June Cleaver impersonation I walked into the room and with a compassionate smile asked “What hurts?” When my son’s eyes caught sight of the large knife in my right hand he quickly smiled and said “I’m cool, I’m cool!” I had discovered yet another home grown cure.

The smooth talking announcer and extremely tiny print in ads scrolling at the bottom of the screen are like that knife. “We’ll improve one part of your body at the cost of destroying or irritating every other part of your being.” It becomes a never ending spiral because you then need another drug to protect some organ that will be damaged by your new medication.  But don’t worry there’s another treatment (with side effects) to counter the side effects of that.  On top of that, any organ that you may have already hindered on your own will prevent you from using the drug in the first place. (Livers come to mind.)

What fascinates me is when ads then tell you about revolutionary medical discoveries that may prevent you from going under the knife. I often wonder how one discovers miracle drugs from unlikely sources. I have visions from my childhood backyard. If just once, while watching a headless chicken  cover every inch of the yard, my Grandma had looked at the item in her hand and pondered “ What can we do with the comb?” we could have been rich. Yikes!

It is an eye opening experience advancing into this stage of life. The challenge is to accept the declining changes in my body without letting it affect my spirit. I’ve accepted that anything I do from now on will appear in my obituary under  the paragraph that starts “In her later years…” and hopefully will end “She finished strong.”

I am embracing this stage with a smile and wonder, confident there’s an Alert available in case I get lost.